Self Insertion

Chapter 21

Ahhhh College

Josh, JD (Josh Devan) and Evan appeared in a swirl of orangish blue portal magic right in front of a Mandarin

"Hey guys...Do you hear that music?"JD asked. in the background all that could be heard was "You go out on Friday night..." "Holy Crap Were in Undergrads!" all the boys screamed.

Josh stared dead ahead. "Mandarin... ohhh..." Josh started to drool something hardcore.

Evan looked at the building in front of them. "Yeah... it is a mandarin... I've got a hankering for Chinese."

Josh nodded. "Must buy...." Josh reached into his back pocket and pulled out his empty wallet. "HEY!! WHERE THE HELL IS MY MONEY!!!"

Evan averted his eyes and started whistling. "Doo doo doo... Hey JD... wanna go someplace... away from Josh... I just happen to have a hundred or so dollars which was donated to me by a kindly old lady."

JD Shrugged. "We could always go get plastered..."

All of a sudden Rocko passed by yelling "Don't trust the Irish...."

"Hey Rocko, I just happen to have about a hundred bucks on me....and im lookin for some beer and some bitches...Care to help me out?" Evan asked.

"What? Who the hell are you? Are you Irish?" Rocko asked Evan.

"Yeah. Fuck you Rocko. Wanna go get drunk?" Evan said, a small amount of chi crackling across his fists.

Rocko shrugged. "Ok... but don't trust the Irish."

Evan shrugged. "Ok, let's get really plastered."

JD shrugged. "I'm going to hang out with Gimpy. See you biznouchies!!" Evan and Josh waved to JD as he headed off to Teckerson.

Josh pondered for a second as JD headed out. "Do you think a hundred bucks will get you drunk?"

Evan put a hand to his chin. "No. Your right. It took me a bitch load more yesterday when I stole your money... I mean... got money from old lady."

"I hate you Evan." Josh said. "Give me back my money."

Evan handed over the money. "FINE!! I'M GONNA WHORE MYSELF!!!"

Josh raised an eyebrow. "What about Blink?"

Evan shrugged. "She's to far away too whore myself off. I'll just hit State U and mac on Jessie and Kimmy. I'm sure they have lot's of money that they would put in my 'sex fund'."

Josh shook his head. "You are strange."

Evan looked at Rocko. "Rocko... you better not come... your ugly."

Rocko shook his fist. "Damn Irish!!"

Evan sent him across the street via telekinesis into a Radio Shack. "Fuck you. Bye Josh! I gotta get laid for money!" With that Evan walked in a direction that he thought could be State U.

And lo, Josh was alone. He walked into the Mandarin and bought very good food... and ate it.

***********

As JD was walking to Gimpy's place he was swinging his sword, and he 'Accendtly' killed Joanh's stalker.

"WHOA! Holy Damn!! Ummmmm nobody saw that...right..well umm might as well take her belonings" JD said while stealing shit from her pockets. JD found Joanh's tape recorder, he pressed 'Play". "Dear Diary..I would die for Jonah as long as we could be together...." Those seemed to be her last words...

"Hey...at least I found a twenty" JD said as he continued walking.

(30 min later)

JD was led to Gimpy via mind trick by Mump who JD made think he was on a treadmill. "Tee hee, its about time that bastard lost some weight" JD said as he walked into Gimpys room, which was covered from wall to wall in Star Wars items.

"Hey Gimp" JD said to Gimpy, who was busy hacking into Marvel HQ and changing Spider-man to Han Solo.

"The Hell?" Gimpy said to JD as he faced JD. "Your right, I don't need to know who you are right now" Gimpy said via mind trick.

"So Gimpy...I wanna learn how to Hack...We gonna do this the easy way or the hard way?" JD asked with an evil grin on his face

************

Approximately the Same time Evan stepped out of one of the dorm rooms with his shirt on backwards. "Thank you for the business." He said, thumbing a couple fifties. A semi covered girl stepped out of the room and smiled. "Thank you Evan, that was the best sex I have ever had."

Evan shrugged, he had heard that a lot today. "Apparently these ladies are not being satisfied. I'm only the solution to this problem." Evan then knocked on Jessie's door.

She opened it slowly. "Hey, what can I do for you?"

Evan smiled. "That's not the question. The question is, what can I do for you?"

"Are you trying to whore yourself?" Jesse asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yup."

"Go away."

"Wait! I'll make it worth your while!" Evan said while casting a seduction spell.

Jessie slowly fell under the influence of the spell and kinky stuff ensued.

About an hour later Evan stepped out of the room. Thumbing his now much fatter wad of cash.

"Your going to call me right!?!"

Evan shrugged. "Sure whatever."

**************

Josh smiled as he entered State U. "Hmmm school. Mmmm kay." Josh then walked to the dorm rooms figuring he could find someone to crash off of. It wouldn't be hard... just find the right people. "Let's see. I'm in undergrads so I could just pose as Cal's long lost cousin and crash with him and Nitz guy. I do a pretty mean Cal impression."

Josh smiled as he came across the room the had "Nitz and Cal's room" printed on the front. "No time like the present."

Josh then knocked on the door, he heard foot steps and then cleared his throat testing out his high pitched Cal voice. "Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! VALERIEEEE!!"

The door then opened. Nitz was standing there. "Can I do something for you?" He asked.

Josh looked down at Nitz and smiled widely. "Hey Guy! What's up?"

Nitz became pale.

Josh continued. "Hey. I'm Josh. I'm Cal's cousin. Kind of one of those long lost situations guy."

Nitz began to grind his teeth. *Please don't say you're staying with us. Please don't say you're staying with us.  Please don't say you're staying with us.  Please don't say you're staying with us.  Please don't say you're staying with us.*

"I figured I could crash with Cal till I can get my own dorm guy. Thanks for being so hospitable." Josh then walked past and into the room.

Nitz fell to his knees and screamed. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!"

****************

Evan heard the familiar scream of despair, and feeling drawn to it, rushed to the scene. "SUFFERING!! I FEEL YOUR SWEET, SWEET EMBRACE!!!"

One of the local goth chicks pumped a fist into the air. "You go fellow goth!!"

Evan turned towards the goth chick. "How about a quickie for a fifty?"

"Kay."

Thirty minutes later. "That was quite the quickie."

the goth chick fell to the floor. "Oh god. Here is your money. Now stay with me for eternity."

Evan smiled. "Maybe in another eternity, I gots ta pimp myself off good... and get real drunk!"

Goth chick smiled as Evan ran down the hall and began singing "There goes my hero". Some random guy started strumming the chords to the song on his guitar, and another person played the beat on their drum kit. Evan shook his head as he ran. *What have I done? What have I done?...Other then getting laid for money.* "SW33T!!! I GOT LAID FOR MONEY!!!" {And he just realizes this now.}(So I can be thick skulled. Big deal.) A bunch of guy started clapping and patting him on the back as he rushed down the hall.

A couple minutes later Evan arrived at Nitz's room. He heard the hallowed refrain of the 'Valerie song' from two separate vocal chords, though very similar high pitched vocal chords. "Oh sweet jebus. The world is at it's end." Evan attempted to open the door but found that it was locked. He cast a phase spell on himself and passed through the door instead.

Josh and Cal were playing on Cal's crappy keyboard, singing away, as they laughed and they played... just best friends... best friends are they. "I hate you guys." Evan said.

Josh looked up at Evan. "Hey guy! What's up?"

Evan breathed in deeply and glared at Josh. "You realize what you have done?"

"Yeah guy! Me and my best buddy Cal guy are singing... guy."

Cal smiled. "Yeah guy. Josh guy is great at singing guy. We made a whole song guy. Wanna hear it?"

"NO!!! no..." Evan stated a little quick thrusting out his hands to emphasize that he did not want them to play. "Not on your life will I hear that song! (Rant time) I will never listen to the evil of Valerie repeated countless times. NO! I shall not endure it! For it is of the most evil substance! The trivial meanderings of two Calesque morons chanting a fiendish theme shall not enter my brain! I shall destroy your satanic shells before one note. One note! Enters my ears! Thou shalt be punished before God!!"

Josh shrugged and turned back to Cal. "Hey guy I'm going to go talk to Evan guy."

Cal nodded. "Sure guy! I'll work on the song."

Josh then walked away with Evan into a separate room. "Listen Evan." He said in his normal voice. "I'm going to be crashing here until the next jump. I'm posing as Cal's cousin and I have to play the part."

Evan nodded. "Oh. Okay." Evan then looked over to the kitchen where Nitz was getting a glass of water. "I'll probably stay in my own dorm room. I'll kick some punk college kid out."

Josh nodded. "Cool. I'll see you later." Evan then transported out of there.

"Hey guy." Cal said. "Your friend take off?"

"Yeah guy." Josh said. Just then Nitz, as he was walking over to his room, tripped on a floor mat and the glass of water flew out of his hand, splashing Josh. Josh screamed when the change overtook her. Josh looked down at her female body and smiled in her mind. She then looked up horrified at Nitz who, along with Cal was staring in shock at the now female Josh. "What the hell did you do Nitz guy?" Josh asked horrified.

Nitz stared at the empty glass on the floor and then up at Josh again. "I don't... I don't..."

Cal glared at Nitz. "I don't know what you did to my cousin Nitz guy... but it wasn't cool.

*****************

"Well seeing how I am interested on seeing what will happen....I will have to say nay! I will not show you how to hack we will have to do it THE HARD WAY!" Gimpy said in his gimp like voice.

JD then had an evil looking smirk on his face "So be it...I AM SHE-MAN! BY THE POWER OF MAGICAL STUFF I KICK ASS!" JD then turned into She-Man.

"The Hell?!?" Gimpy said as he looked in horror at the half-man/half-woman thing standing infront of him. "Well my friend don't think that just because you became a woman-man type person doesn't mean im gonna show you how to hack..." Gimpy said.

Just then Mump was heard screaming "AHHH NO!!! GIRLS HELP ME!!!! DON'T THEY KNOW IM A SUPER DUPER HOMO AND I SCREAM GAYYYYY EVERYTIME I DO SOMETHING?!?!"

"See Gimpy...I also have mind tricks.....like JEDI! And if you don't I will do horrorific things to you" JD said now starting to get really pissed but horny for 2 reasons. 1.Gimpy had a poster of Obi-Wan that was really hot. And 2.It was JD's dream to be a chick.

"If your really like a Jedi prove it.........AH NO.......Outside.....Oh God no...No..NOOOO! *achoo* *cough* make it stop please...I'll do anything!"

"That's what I thought" JD said standing in a Jedi like pose. "First things first Gimp...Im really getting tired of seeing Britney Spears.....so what I want you to do is hack into her computer and......"

" Make the computer crash causing her to catch fire and die a slow horible death?" Gimpy finished the sentence.

"Oh you're good" JD added.

*************************

Female Josh frowned as she sat down only because Cal was eyeing Josh and she didn't really feel like that was cool.

"No Cal, it's not gonna happen you will not seduce me with your Cal like glare. So just stop" Josh said calmly.

And with that Cal went to the bath room and started to sing "You spin me right round baby right round like record bab..." " SHUT THE HELL UP CAL" Josh yelled. Josh was very bitchy right now

[Must be that time of the month-JD]

Cal came out of the bathroom and smiled. "Listen Josh Guy. I'm sorry. That wasn't actually my seduction glare. That was my sympathy glare."

Josh looked confused. "What the hell guy!? They look the exact SAME!!!"

************************

Evan appeared in some random student's room. "Hey!! WOMAN!! GET OUT OF HERE!!!" He screamed in a Cartman accent. The stoned kid looked up from his bong and smiled.

"You're one happy mushroom mister."

Evan shook his head and evaporated the boy with a small chi blast. He then proceeded to evaporate everything in the room. Evan muttered about the hard work and pulled out his ideal room from his anime universe, complete with a weapon table, and a lock for his door... that happened to be linked to a 50 caliber machine gun that would fire if the wrong password was entered.

"This looks peachy." He said as he hopped onto his water bed and flicked on the 50" Tv. A DVD started playing due to his magical influence and Evan watched the first four episodes of GTO.

*************************

Josh smiled she finally got out of Cal and Nitz's room for a while. She met up with JD moments later after she left. "Sup JD?" She asked nonchalantly.

"Josh shrugged. I'm forcing Gimpy to do hacking for me."

"Cool... want to turn into an Eva and rampage through towns?"

"Yes...Yes I do."

So they did.

****************

Evan flicked on the news after watching GTO, and realized that JD and Josh were having more fun then him.

*Today the strangest event in all of this town's history has occurred. Two giant robots have begun rampaging random parts of the town there is no reason why these giant robots should be doing this... or even why they exist... in fact... why the hell am I existing? Why can you see me in your homes when I am miles away and safe from this travesty? You are probably all going to be squeeshed into little people pancakes! AND I'M GONNA LAUGH!!! CAUSE I'M A CRAZY MOTHER FUCKER!!! WHOOOO!!!! DIE BASTARD FACES!!! THIS IS FOR THELMA!!! LEAVE ME YOU BITCH!!! WELL AREN'T YOU GOING TO DIE SOMETHING FIERCE!!!!....* Evan flicked off the Tv.

*Hmm... I think that man might have been crazy.... oh well. It's Eva time.* Evan walked out side of his dorm and pressed a button on his Eva armband. State U was totaled.... Except Cal and Evan's rooms... cause Evan spared them.

"I AM THE WRATH OF GOD!!!" Evan screamed as he trashed more and more of the campus. "YOU SHALL ALL BURN!!!" He then pulled out an oversized flamethrower and began burning things randomly whilst tossing N2 mines at random countries. {You could get good distance with an Eva.} "THAT'LL TEACH YOU FOR BEING HUMAN!!!"

Chaos ensued... and some where... sometime... a kitten cried... I'm not sure how or where or when... but it happened.

Josh noticed Evan causeing massive destruction with his Eva and waved at him. "HEY EVAN!! WHAT'S UP!?!?"

Evan smiled evilly. "I BURN THINGS!!!"

"I HEAR THAT!!" JD said from not too far away. The three of them all then jumped up and high fived each other. Causing a level three rictor scale earthquake, and killed thousands of people, and destroyed several buildings.

Evan looked down at his watch and shrugged. "It's almost time to go to the next universe." He said.

"I thought we were staying longer." Josh said.

Evan shrugged "Changed my mind."

"Whoa! Where'd you get the EVA watch!?" JD asked.

"Mail order from tokyo." Evan said. "We got about ten minutes."

All of a sudden Godzilla appeared.

Evan looked over at the giant reptile. "You guys thinking what I'm thinking."

Josh raised an Eva eyebrow...thing... "If we were wouldn't we be clinically insane?"

Evan nodded. "Yup. So then, you guys wanna go to the next universe without me? I've got an epic battle to take part in, and I'll get there in a bit."

JD shrugged. "Whatever."

Evan opened the portal and force pushed them both into it. "Ok Gorgira. I'ma gonna kick your ass!!!" Godzilla started to hump Evan's leg.

"BOH GOB!!! THAT IS DISGUSTING!!!" Evan reached down to Godzilla's mouth and pryed it open... he then forced an N2 mine down the reptile's throat and ran like hell into the still open portal.

It sploded good. It was messy.

****************

Milliardo Peacecraft sat back in the cockpit of Epyon. It was a beautiful machine, it's capabilities surpassed by none, but matched by his rival's Gundam, The Wing Zero. He knew that Heero would come to him, him and his army. But the army would be nothing compared to the might of Wing Zero, Milliardo knew that but he was willing to make that sacrifice. Any sacrifice was worth it if it meant that Earth, the home of his pathetic species, would be destroyed. Even now the Libra, the space station he currently was magnetized to, was prepared to fire it main weapon that had the power of twenty nuclear warheads. But even if the main gun didn't work, Milliardo could simply initiate the drop and the Libra would crash into the Earth like a meteor supposedly did so many years ago, destroying an equally malicious race.

All of a sudden Milliardo's com crackled to life. "Sir. Three unidentified objects have appeared, leaving a massive energy signature that faded swiftly shortly after they appeared. They appear to be human shaped. We are awaiting your orders."

Milliardo pondered this. "Hmm. One mobile suit with two dolls. Make it quick."

"Yes sir."

*What could this be?* Milliardo thought as he awaited his enemy.

The com crackled again. "Sir, the target is three males. They do not have suits on or appear to be dangerous."

"Of course they are not dangerous. If they aren't wearing some sort of protection they must be dead." Milliardo said with mild annoyance.

"But sir, that is the thing. They appear to be mobile and all vital signs are perfect condition."

"WHAT!?!" Milliardo screamed, losing his legendary calmness. "Capture them and bring them inside the Libra for questioning."

"What about the Gundams?"

"Are they here?"

"No sir."

"Then we don't have a problem yet. Bring the trio to me."

*************

A short time later inside of space station Libra. "Guys, we are in Gundam Wing." Evan said, running his left hand up and down his right Eva band.

JD jumped up. "SWEET!! DUDE!! WHEN CAN WE SEE DEATHSYTHE!?!"

Josh shrugged. "I have no idea." Josh looked up and noticed that they were in a big ass space station thing. "We could probably ask somebody in the space station."

Evan smiled darkly. "Yeees!" Evan said evilly. "We could ask Mr Peacecraft..."

Josh chimed in. "Or we could break stuff."

Evan smiled and held up a finger. "My thoughts exactly!" He then charged up a chi blast and aimed it at the door in front of them, which opened revealing a red suited man with armed guards. The guards snapped into action. "Sir!! He appears to have energy weapons concealed on his body!! Should we nutra..." the blast that erupted from Evan's palms impacted with the speaking guard turning him into ash. The other guard fired twice, both shots finding their way into Evan's chest and deflecting of his adamantium rib cage.

Evan smiled and a set of claws burst from his left knuckles. "Hey BUB. Wanna dance?" He said, badly impersonating Wolverine.

All of a sudden Josh jumped up onto the ceiling and then dived down straight into the guards head with her fists, crushing him and sending him through the floor in a bloody heap of battered flesh and pureed bone.

Milliardo pulled out a gun and pointed it back and forth between Josh and Evan. "WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE!? STAY BACK!!"

Evan walked slowly up to the great pilot and pushed him against the sealed doors. He then popped two more claws from his right knuckles and pegged Milliardo to the wall in classic Wolverine tradition. "We aren't the tooth fairies. I'll tell you that much. But now it's my turn to ask a question I have always wanted to ask you."

Milliardo began to sweat. "What! What do you want to know!?!"

Evan smiled. "Why in the hell are you going to call yourself Wind in Endless Waltz!?! I mean come on!! WIND!!! GOD!!!"

Milliardo sweated more. "I-I don't know what you are talking about!!!" Evan smiled broader and the third claw on his right hand burst forward impaling itself into the commander's Adam's apple. He bled to death in a few instants.

"Ok, that's done with. Let's go get Gundams and kill shit."

Josh and JD nodded and followed Evan through the halls of the space station. They all gasped at what they stumbled upon moments later.

"WHAT THE HELL!?!!!??!!" Evan exclaimed.

"THIS...CAN'T...BE!!!" Josh said.

JD was silent. Gawking at the sign.

"Starbucks... what the hell is a starbucks doing on the space station Libra?" Evan asked, he then walked in and bought a Mocha. He took a sip. "Interesting... space Mocha..."

Josh ordered a cup of Chuppa. "Good Chuppa."

JD was still in awe, or at least what the other two thought was awe. "Do you have coffee flavoured coffee?" JD asked.

The girl behind the counter shook her head. "No! I'm afraid not."

JD sighed. "Well I see the future has made no advances since we left."

"Hear that!" Josh said.

All of a sudden the Space Station began to ring with the sounds of battle.

"ALL OFFICERS ON DECK!!! GUNDAMS ARE IN RANGE!!! COMMANDER PEACECRAFT TO COMMAND CENTER!!!" A PA system blared.

Evan laughed, almost spilling his Mocha. "DON'T YOU KNOW I KILLED HIM!?!" He screamed to no one in particular.

Josh did a little jig and then flared up his aura. "RAAAAAAGH!!!" Josh then shot a chi blast through the ceiling, opening the station up to the vacuum of space. He then turned into Eva unit two, after telling Evan and JD to do so as well.

They all then became evas 01-03.

"I suddenly made booster jets for all of our Evas!!" Evan stated. "Now we can fly through space!!"

Josh smirked. "Let me guess... magic."

"Y'all don't know ME!" he replied quite nonsensically.

Evan spotted Gundam Wing Zero and locked his targeting system onto the pilot zone. He pulled out a regular pistol (This is for you Dude A) and fired a single shot, penetrating the layer of Gundanium and eviscerating the pilot inside as well as the Gundam. It floated off into space, nothing more than a decorative shell of what it once was.

Duo stopped fighting for a breif second, the head of Deathsythe Hell cocked slightly to the left, the sensors picking up the shell of Wing Zero floating off into the vacuum of space. *Heero...* He thought, and began searching the hoard for his 'friend's' killer. Three strange looking Mobile Suits used their bosters to shoot up slightly and give each other a high five. A deafening scream of 'hear that' ran through all of the pilot's PA systems as well as the Space Station Libra. "Bastards." Duo said with a tinge of anger in his voice. He pushed forward on his controls and Deathsythe Hell plunged through the crowd of Mobile Suits, destroying many of his enemies on the way. He stopped in front of the trio and addressed the one carrying the still smoking pistol. "WHY!?! WHY DID YOU KILL HIM!?!"

Evan and JD looked in awe at the newly arrived suit. "Whoa... it's death..." Josh cut them off by hacking into Deathsythe Hell with his vibro knife, over and over again until it is merely scraps. He then took a small piece of the scraps and located the pilot of the machine. He snagged Duo gently out of space and squinted as he pressed the sliver of metal into the pilot's rib cage and then flung him at breakneck speed into space.'

"Correction..." Josh started as he turned to Evan and JD. "Dead." Josh then paused for a moment as he noticed the burning red auras emenating off of his two friends. "Uhhh was that a bad thing?"

Eva unit 2 then flew through space towards the battling Gundams, impacting with Heavy arms... heavilly. {Shut up!}

Josh shook his head and noticed the Gundam. *Kill shit?= oh yeah!* he thought to himself, before pulling out a Katana sized vibro knife and began hacking... again.

Eva unit 01 shook his head. "What have I created?" He muttered as he spawned about fourty N2 mines and allowed them to drift into the battlefield, acting as proximity mines. Everything But Josh blowed up. Josh managed to see Evan let off the mines and instant transmissioned over to where he and JD were watching with oversized 3D glasses and a huge tub of EVA sized popcorn. "Mail order... don't ask..."

"Riiiight!" Josh said before joining them. "Now how cool are explosions... really!?" He asked.

Evan nodded.

"I've found a new love!" JD said, with tears streaming from his Eva eyes.

Evan turned around and looked at the only remaining thing in the current space besides them. Space Station Libra. "I'm going to complete Operation Meteor."

Josh shrugged. "Ok whatever the hell you're talking about."

Evan handed him a pair of 3D goggles. "Just watch." Evan then set to work. Adding many N2 Mines and a lot of cool booster things to Libra... as well as a small set of Teflon spikes... you know, the stuff they put on the front of Battle Bots. He then pointed to the Earth and slipped on his own pair of goggles. "This is going to be big."

"And cool." JD added.

Space Station Libra started to hurdle towards Earth at a near impossible speed.

"Will it be cooler than Chuppa?" Josh inquired.

Evan shrugged. "A little. What I did to Chuppa was cool... but I think it might pale in comparison to this next trick."

"How many shades?"

"About two."

"Oh."

Space Station Libra started to go through the Earth's atmosphere. Eva unit 01 smiled, proud of his latest work. "Here comes the boom."

Jd smiled. "Ready or not."

"Here comes the boys from the portal!" Josh finished.

"Speaking of which. Once this goes boom, let's leave." Evan said. The others nodded as Libra crashed into the United States and obliterated everything. "SCREW YOU STARBUCKS!!!" Evan called into the blackness of space, watching the silent explosion as Earth imploded.

The trio paused and watched the big kaboom. Then Evan spoke up. "Let's go. I'm bored." He then opened the portal and went through. JD and Josh followed as the human race's home was starting to dissipate into space dust.

*********************

Author's notes: {Well it's authors notes time again... and JD is not here... again. SUCKKER!!}

(JERKASS!)

{Well this chapter was fun huh kids? Random killing and the destruction of everyones favorite characters. The surprising thng is that we're actually going somewhere with this... how fucked up is that!? I'm sure anyone who is still reading this rubbish can agree with me. The next universe will be... different... to say the least. JD will get another power, and something will happen to Evan and me that changes our whole view on things.

That and we're going to bring in Religion.}

(What?)

{Uhhh nothing.}

(HE SAID RUBBISH!!)

Morden Night :mordennight@hotmail.com

mordennight.tripod.com

(Yeah... rubbish.... Anywho, I'm an evil bastard who kills shit. I enjoy N2 mines... a little to much... anyway, JD is on a 'date' with a 'woman' who is 'hot' and 'nice'. What that translates to is he is trying to get laid by an ugly old lady who hates the world... and is a Nazi... maybe... but don't tell him I said that... and the coffee flavoured coffee thing is my joke...)

{But I wrote it}

(But I said it at Starbucks after I had a heart attack at Red Dragon!!)

{It's true folks. He had a heart attack when the three of us went to see Red Dragon... yeah and they don't have coffee flavored coffee.}

(IT'S A CONSPIRACY!!!)

Evan McNeely: evanthewanderer@hotmail.com

(and I got a website now... it's interesting.) Evan_m0.tripod.com

[Hi, I could be JD. But I'm not... so there. Actually this is Evan... but I think I'm JD... but I'm not.]

{Now when a seventeen year old kid has a heart attack let me ask you something... does that make sense?...........No. Ladies and gentlemen of the supposed jury it does NOT MAKE */-**__SENSE__**-/*!!!!!}

Note super emphasis on "sense".

TBC

***************

also TBC... {I know you hate me.}